Senior Transition Brings a Dose of Reality
Senior life is great, until it isn’t.
That has become abundantly clear to me over the past several months as my brothers and I moved our sister to an assisted living facility in Red Wing. I’ve now seen firsthand how complicated our health care and senior care systems have become and how much is left up to us to figure out.
Think about it. Retirement is great but it involves more than fun and games. You need to prepare for the inevitable. So, you make a detailed will. You pre-plan your funeral. You buy life insurance for someone else to enjoy. You might even buy long-term care insurance. With all of that, you’re move-in ready, right? Nope. There is still much to do.
If you live in your own home, you dread the day when your health needs require more than you can handle. Depending on needs, it might involve in-home care or moving to a facility that can provide services like assisted living, nursing care or memory care. Can you handle all that on your own? You can’t just drive up to an assisted living facility and move right in.
My sister Laurel, who will be 80 this year, has lived in Rochester since the 1960s and has lived alone since her husband died in 2005. We had been encouraging her to move back to her hometown of Red Wing for many years but she always demurred even though she could afford it.
The Situation Changes
Her reluctance to move changed when she needed surgery to restore circulation in her legs due to complications from diabetes. A big toe was removed. Recovery meant weekly cast changes on her foot, then a boot.
My brothers and I wisely turned much of it over to wife Catherine who already had power of attorney for her and has dealt with situations like Laurel’s for many years in her law practice. She knew what was involved and she also knew that my brothers and I would likely just make a mess of things.
Laurel spent nearly two months recovering at a rehabilitation center in Rochester, practicing walking and just getting around on her own. Rochester, as you can imagine, has many rehab facilities to choose from. But they are often full and are having trouble hiring staff. How would you know where to go? Fortunately, Mayo Clinic has social workers who coordinate with the rehab facilities for available rooms.
But the communication between the clinic and rehab is not the best. There were often questions about medications and wound care for her foot. There were medical terms we had to look up. I’m amazed understaffed medical crews can keep track of anything considering the small amount of time they can spend with patients. But you can’t blame them. They are often overwhelmed, and double shifts are common.
Physical therapy was a slow enough process that we became concerned about the number of rehab days Medicare would cover, one of many Medicare questions throughout the entire process. Plus, before she could move to the assisted living facility, she had to show that she could get around by herself. Once she realized this, she focused more on therapy.
New Everything
The move to Red Wing meant that she was getting a new address, phone number, new doctors, and much more. But because Laurel is part of a senior population left behind by modern tech, she needed help dealing with these changes since so much of it is now done online.
She has no computer and knows nothing about using email or a web browser. She had trouble just using a cellular flip phone. It’s not really her fault. She’s quite capable of learning to use technology. It just takes a lot of practice and a patient teacher.
Laurel’s mail was forwarded to our house and her bills set to autopay. Laurel could not easily have done that on her own. Her address and phone number changes affected everything. She was still carrying insurance through the Rochester Schools where her husband was a teacher. That proved to be more expensive than a good Medicare supplement plan. Who knew?
My brother Warren sold her car. Catherine is selling Laurel’s house to a neighbor who agreed to buy it as is. It needs a lot of work. An issue with a basement wall is holding up financing.
We’re not yet done but at least she’s now moved into her assisted living apartment. She has new furniture, a new bed and a meal plan. She gets help with her medications. A new phone system provides her with a handset in every room. We replaced her huge old tube TV with a seven-pound flat panel that gets more channels than you could watch in a year. She just needs to practice using everything.
Finding local doctors is next. But that should be easy since Mayo Clinic is already here. Now, most of what Laurel needs is just small stuff like paper towels and Kleenex. She’ll make lists. But overall, I think she loves it.
This whole process has reminded Catherine why she retired. Note to my brothers: don’t get the idea that she will do all this for you someday.
She’ll be doing it for me.